Saturday, January 21, 2017

Break the last chain of own bondage! Live Free!

Watching great movies like HIDDEN FIGURES is often more special than they were intended to be. That is exactly what happened to me when last Sunday,  I went to see this possibly best movie of the year.

In this brilliant movie, three wonderful African-American women worked at NASA -- Katherine Johnson portrayed by Taraji P. Henson, Dorothy Vaughan portrayed by Octavia Spencer and Mary Jackson portrayed by Janelle MonĂ¡e. These three women were the brains behind the launch of astronaut John Glenn into orbit, one of the greatest accomplishments in the history of US.

Most inspiring movies try to teach us something and are made with a message hidden in the storyline.  However, depending on our own mindset and current situation or past history, sometimes the messages we obtain may not necessarily be the message that the moviemaker intended for us to receive. Often it is a lot more important one because it triggers something in us that opens the door in our minds for an even bigger revelation that we had been waiting for and needing for a very long time.

This Sunday, by the end of the movie Hidden Figures, I felt very proud of the three amazing black women who fought the fight against segregation in their own beautiful way. They used their intelligence and persistence to demand respect for themselves. They were not going to let anyone treat them less then anyone else just because they were black. They proved that they were as good and maybe even better than any white person. They proved that the color of ones skin did not make the person.

What I also saw, and probably the movie had no plans to show, was that as all the three women were fighting against the white community for equality, a big part towards their success in this fight, this civil war, was that they had family support. Their families believed that they deserved better and supported them in their fight against segregation. This was a community wide fight. All black men and women were fighting for this equality together.

Of course, I was happy for these very real women depicted in this story, who fought against segregation and for equality in 1961. They were able to fulfill their dreams and were able to change the culture at NASA. They were able to stop segregation within NASA and gained the respect they deserved.

As I came out of the cinema and walked to my car, I could not stop my eyes from tearing up.  I realized that my heart was welling up because I did not have that family and community support in my civil war against domestic abuse.  I have been fighting alone against domestic abuse all my life since I was a little girl. No one ever taught me to fight for my rights. No one ever showed me that I deserve to be respected.  No one ever encouraged me to believe that my feelings mattered.

I have been and I am the Hero of my life.  I am surprised and proud of myself; I never gave in or gave up. I always said NO to abuse.  And the fight goes on. I am still learning and growing as I use my experiences and strength to help my sons and others in similar abusive situations.

I choose to live an abuse-free life that I am proud of and I will never accept less than best for me.  After much introspection, I am ready to break the last chain of own bondage.

I am free!

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

2017 is going to be a good year!

 I plan on being good and kind, and accept only good and kind from others.

So far this year has been amazing in so many ways.   I have leaned that even though I may love someone, love my family and love my friends, I have the right and it is my job to hold on to my sanity, safety, values and happiness.

Most people have their own way of living and many may try to impose their views on you.  Even the good books you read have someone else’s views.  It is your job to take time and pay attention to your own feelings and do what feels right to you. It is fine to learn from other people’s teachings and experiences but it is your own experiences that count towards your life. Your character and integrity is what makes you the person that you are. Whether someone else is happy or proud of you does not matter as much as if you are happy with yourself and are proud of the person you are.

It is important to stand up for your rights and feelings.  Sometimes you may get the chance to help protect someone else whose basic rights are being threatened.  This is the time for you to stand up and do the right thing.  No one should has a right to hurt another human being.

It is only the first week of the New Year, and I have had to stand up for my rights as well as the rights of a young child. I am a grown woman and I understand that the choices I make have consequences. I can let someone take control and hurt me or I can take the control back in my hands and keep the promise to myself which is never to accept less than what’s good and kind.

But, children are innocent and helpless. If someone hurts them, they have no way to protect themselves especially if the people who hurt them are the same people who are supposed to be taking care and protecting them.  What can these children do and where can they go if their own homes are not safe for them? It should be our responsibility to pay attention and listen to children. Children are our future and need to be protected, not ignored or mistreated. Children need to be taught how to resolve disputes peacefully with words not anger and violence by the example from adults in their lives.

This year, I plan on being good and kind, and accept only good and kind from others.
2017 is going to be a good year! That is my goal! I will not let anyone tell me differently.