Do I have to have an ultimate goal?

Do I have to have an ultimate goal?

Photo by Yasmina Rossi

Some people have asked me what my goal in life is, or if publishing is my ultimate goal.

 I don’t really have a set or ultimate goal in life.  How can I have an ultimate goal today when I don’t know what tomorrow will bring? I chose to stay open and ready to change or at least adjust my path as the life journey expects. I feel that if I pay attention to my every choice and always do what keeps me centered on a foundation of happiness, I will be fine. Even though I might not know now where I will be in the end, I have faith that as long as I don’t go too far from what is right and good for me, I will end up in a good place.

My goal is to do something good with my life. So, I make small goals and I always make sure I fulfill those goals. I don’t want to have inflexible long-term goals that will only limit me. I want to stay flexible and open to all opportunities that come my way. I believe that I will learn a lot more by staying open and willing to change. 

I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.  Sometimes I don’t know the reason and I enjoy trying to figure out that reason. I don’t like to force something to happen. What if it’s not the right thing for me? Maybe it was not supposed to happen. I do not want to interfere with the universe too much. If I had, I would not be here today.

I was a computer science major running a software company with my ex-husband in Michigan.  I never thought I’d be publishing a lifestyle magazine out of Malibu. Who knew I would be so happy doing what I am doing today. Could I be doing what I’m doing now if I had set a goal prematurely not knowing what life had in store for me?  I still don’t know for sure what I am going to do when I grow up, so why set an ultimate goal and have life change it on me anyway? So, I chose to stay flexible and happy in whatever I do. I am sure it is all good.  In the meantime I will keep sharing  All Good News through Malibu Chronicle.

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Learning to L.I.V.E. was written to increase awareness of domestic abuse  and eradicate this cancer from our society by empowering women and men who are suffering due to this epidemic.  The author, Veera Mahajan's goal is to help them believe that they deserve a life in freedom and self-love.  

Am I real in this moment?

Am I real in this moment?

photo by Yasmina Rossi

The only thing we know for sure is this moment. Everything else is what has been or what we think might be. We can always start something new in this moment, or even fix from now on and build on the solid and real moment that is now. If we are not living in the moment and are living in the past or for the future, we can really mess up what we have right now.

What is in the past is already there. You cannot go back to change it for better or worse. You can only learn from it and make a choice now in this moment to make this moment the best you can for yourself. Be the real you in every moment. That is the only time you have to be the real you. The rest is what you used to be and what you hope or fear to be.

You will never be sure what the future will be. There are so many factors from the past or occurring in this very moment that will affect your future. Some of those factors could be in your control and others may come from other sources that may influence your life. The only things you have control over are your actions in this moment. So focus on that and live in this moment. Enjoy it to the fullest as you take every step. Enjoy every step. Be mindful of every step as you live it and as you enjoy it. Don’t take it for granted. Nothing happens just to happen. Everything you do affects some chain of reaction. 

Think about it.  You are here today because of all the choices you made in your past and the chain reaction of events resulting from those choices. Some of your choices were made in response to the choices made by other people in your life. Either way, you have a choice, and the choice you make is in this moment. If you look closely, this moment is the only time when you have a choice. The chance to make a different choice in the past is lost. It is what it is. You can build on it or try to change from this moment on.

That is the other reason for living and making right decisions. You can at every moment know that you are doing the best and enjoying the moment as you do your best. No one can expect you to do better than your best.  That is the rule I live by and I don’t expect anything more from myself. You also have to make time to enjoy the moments you have.

So, slow down, speak less and listen more to yourself and to others. Do what you think is best for you and for others in that moment. Watch yourself in every step. Ritualize simple things in your daily life. Enjoy and savor the moments. That is all you have. Everything else is what has been and could be.

Live in the present moment. That is real. Think too much and it is gone. Enjoy it!

                   
Buy your copy on Kindle
Buy your copy on Amazon

Learning to L.I.V.E. was written to increase awareness of domestic abuse  and eradicate this cancer from our society by empowering women and men who are suffering due to this epidemic.  My goal is to help them believe that they deserve a life in freedom and self-love.  

A joyful weekend with family!

A joyful weekend with family!

It has been 4 months since I last saw my son Kunal. He has been very busy starting a new business called Explode Fitness in New York.  Even though we talk on the phone everyday, it is not the same as being with him. I don’t want to get accustomed to not seeing my sons for such a long time. So, it was wonderful to have him here this weekend. My expression of joy started with grocery shopping for his favorite foods and cooking, then driving to the airport in happy anticipation and spotting him from a distance – a tall, handsome young man. Seeing him in person is so amazing!

Kunal was obviously happy to be here, too, as we greeted each other with a warm hug and kiss. He sat beside me as I drove home, and we talked all the way. I love him so much.

My son Rahul lives here in L.A. and visits me often. I am blessed to have one of my sons close by. When Rahul walked through the door and saw Kunal, he went straight to his brother and they held each other in a long hug. Seeing them embrace each other like that with love brings me great joy. This is what I want for my boys. I want them to be there for each other for the rest of their lives. I hope that their love will stand strong through thick and thin. I hope that they will take care of each other all their lives. They are good to and for each other. I love my boys individually and especially when they are together.

My nieces Megan and Erin came over for dinner one night. That was a special treat. They are about the same age as my boys. The four of them are close and have fun together. We went to beautiful Geoffrey’s Malibu for dinner and spent a laughter- filled, happy time together.

This was a wonderful weekend. Monday arrived and everyone had to go back to work. Kunal returned to New York. Rahul left for a fashion show in Vegas. I am here remembering and reminiscing with gratitude and happiness, and writing - back to my work.

Life is good! Life spent with family is wonderful!

Who Should Make You Happy?

Who Should Make You Happy?

I have learned to graciously accept love, care and respect from others when it comes free of any expectations in return. I have also learned to never expect love and care from anyone. Any kind of expectation is closely attached to the possibility of some sort of disappointment. If you take care of yourself and find a way to make yourself happy without depending on someone else for your happiness, the chances are that you will be able to maintain the happiness in your life much better and for a long time.  Making you happy is your responsibility.  The sooner you learn this fact the happier you will be.

I strongly urge you to practice self-sufficiency. It’s wonderful to have loved ones, friends and companions in your life. It’s great to spend your happy time with one another and add to their joy. Yes, it’s also helpful to have friends and family if they are there for you when you are in a bad place and want their support. However, it’s unhealthy, unreasonable and even unfair to put the burden of your happiness on someone else.

Having support is good and is helpful to get through a difficult time, but please remember that any time, good or bad shall pass. It shall pass whether you have someone to help you or not. You will find a way to get through it.

If you chose to stay strong, positive and forward-looking, you will not only get through the difficult time, you will feel so much better about yourself - even if you don’t feel so good about some people you thought were your friends and expected their support.  Another benefit of self-reliance is that this experience will make you stronger. It will also help you learn whom you can count on in the future. It will definitely make you feel more confident and prepared for similar difficult situations. You might not even find them difficult anymore; you would know how to handle them because you would have learned from having this experience.

Life is a string of experiences, some good and pleasant, and some not so much. As long as you can string more good experiences together, you will surely have a good life.  The more control you have of these experiences, the better chance you will have to work them in your favor. So, take charge and don’t depend on someone else to help you enjoy the best life possible.

No one knows better than you about what makes you happy.  Spend time with yourself and find out what makes you happy. Do what makes you happy.  Others may come and go, but you are with yourself for life. So, take care of yourself and love yourself.  Be Happy!

How Do I Measure My Best?

How Do I Measure My Best?

 I am doing the best I can!

My best measure of doing the best I can is not for anyone else.   I have finally realized that being happy and comfortable with myself is more important than spinning my wheels to make other people happy. For one, you can never make someone else happy, they have to choose to be happy or not. The more I do, the more I have to do. It is never enough.

I have also realized that being the person that makes me happy and the person I can respect is more important because, even if someone likes me (or not), it is more important that I like myself.  I have to live with myself.  So I make sure that I try to do everything that makes me a good person in my eyes. I do my best to be nice to others and try to be around positive energy because that makes me a better and happier person. Also, I like myself more when I’m peaceful, so I try to stay on the peace path.

I’m learning that when I focus my energy on more peaceful things I automatically repel what doesn’t fit in my life.  The universe brings similar energies to me. I’m also learning to stay open to accepting happy healthy people with their positive energies in my life.  I’m learning that as I become more open, more wonderful things and people come to my life.

I try to start my day with a few minutes of conscious surrendering to life. I try to have a positive start. I am quiet for a while before getting out of bed to let the universe know I am ready to accept whatever it has to bring my way. And I am often pleasantly surprised how the universe lines up people and things for me for that day. It’s almost as if it lays out the red carpet for me and I just have to be willing to step on it. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not expecting things to happen for me. I am always working and willing to put in my share. I’ve decided to not know more than the universe knows. I’m open to follow the way that the universe shows me. I’ve stopped fighting and ignoring my intuition.  The more I follow my intuition the more it takes care of me. That’s the only way I think the universe can communicate with me, and I am learning to enjoy our conversations.

I am learning to love and trust myself.  I Like ME! It is important!

Just Make a Wish and Let the Universe Make it Happen!

Just Make a Wish and Let the Universe Make it Happen!

I have become a believer of letting the Universe know my wishes and letting it go.  It has worked most of the time. I think the only time it didn’t happen was when I either did not wish it clearly and/or earnestly enough, or the Universe was looking out for my best interest and protecting me from my own stupid wish. The Universe knows better!

Just remember to not put a deadline on your wish to come true. The Universe knows when the time is right for you to have your wish so you can enjoy the maximum benefit and pleasure of having what you wished for.

It has been happening since I was a kid: I was about ten years old growing up with three brothers when, one day, as I got really tired of my brothers bothering me, I told my mother, “I want to live on top of a hill alone where no one bothers me.” I forgot about that wish, but many years later, after living a “normal American life” - getting a degree, getting married, having children, developing a successful career, and getting a divorce - I moved to Malibu where I now live on top of a hill.  The Universe was listening and waiting for the right time to grant me my wish. I am happy!

It is still happening: We have had McLaren on our Malibu Chronicle cover, then we had Sun Air Jets on our cover, and for the past couple of months I was thinking I need a yacht on our cover.  Unexpectedly, a few weeks ago, my friend Rolf Smith introduced me to David Robb, founder of The UTOPIA, the biggest ship on the seas - And in the next issue we have The UTOPIA on our cover!  The Universe never lets me down. I guess the timing of my wish was just right - I was ready - the Universe did not have to wait years - my wish came true in a few weeks.

My connection with the Universe is getting stronger! On Sunday, I was at our Malibu Chronicle booth at the Malibu Arts Festival.  All my staff had to leave early and I was alone at closing time. I had a lot of things to pack and carry to the car. As I was wondering how was I going to do this, a friend, Gary Markowitz, offered to move the chairs. Then I looked at the rest of the bags and boxes and I thought, “Okay, I can carry some of the bags,” and had not even finished my thought when my friend Doug Machado came along with another friend (Just the right amount of helping hands I needed!) to help me move the boxes to my car. I did not even have to ask him, he just offered, “We’ll help you carry this.” I was not surprised that they came just when I needed them. I did not expect it to happen, but I was open to receiving help and appreciated the help.

 I don’t take this blessing for granted. I am not sure how long it will last, but I am grateful that it is happening. I am sure the Universe has a message in all of that for me as well. I hope I will get the message one day, so in the mean time, I am enjoying it! 

Being grateful for everyone and everything in my life! I am letting the Universe show me the way!